Serenity
by Raven8311
Summary: Hope goes through a lot as a kid. Rated M for Male Male loving later on, and self/parental abuse


**Serenity**

___**He's a painter, only his brush is a razor.. His canvas? His wrists.  
**_  
Down... Pull.. Lift. This process repeats on and on, until all he can see is red.. The red calms, the red is safe.. The red is blood. As a teen you'd think that he'd have all of this figured out, that this obsession would be "bad" for him.. He understands this, though he fights his realization with everything he has.  
Alone in a bathroom after a day of useless shit and pathetic excuses for humans, he kind of loses sight of reality. He has to go to his one release. That is where he is now. A razor in one hand, a manic smile on his face, he sighs in relief as the blood drips down his forearm.  
If you passed him by at any other location he'd be just like any other kid. He smiles, he laughs, he jokes around with his "friends". It's all a facade that he puts up, a show for the lesser beings that he despises. It's a bit funny really.. The people he calls friends don't even bother to ask what is wrong. Nobody knows, that he is seconds away from hacking away at his wrists without abandon, that he may or may not commit homicide, or suicide. That's the question nowadays, which is easier? To kill a few people, or to kill himself. It's a toss-up to him.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Class, the bane of my existence. I can't believe that I have to go back into school. Lightning told me that I could stay with her as long as I go to school every day, thus my being here. Pushing my silver bangs out of my eyes, I glance up at the banner over the door of the entrance. "Welcome new students to New Bodhum High!" Rolling my eyes, I step forward towards the entrance doors.

"Watch out shrimp!" I hear from behind me then jerk forward as I am pushed from behind. "Told you to move wimp," I turn my head to look at the guy, "next time, I won't just push you." He punches his fists together as he turns away laughing. I watch him walk away until a gloved hand enters my line of sight.

"Hey, you alright there kid?" After pulling me up he turns me around and brushes me off. "Noticed you took a spill, just wanted to make sure Kreiss didn't hurt ya too bad." I nod at him signaling my decency and walk off without a word. "Dude," I cringe as he grabs my arm and yanks towards him, "name's Snow Villiers. You should really learn to get a name before walking off. Might save ya some day, not always gonna have a hero around." He smirks at this and I roll my eyes.

"Hope," I mutter out of my mouth, "Hope Estheim. I'd thank you for helping me, but you arrived directly after the guy showed up. Not always around, are you "hero"." I turn and walk off with him staring at my back.

Guys like that are what give freshmen a bad name. Seniors think they can do everything. It is complete bullshit. Last guy I met like that was my father. He didn't seem much of a hero when my mother plummeted into the dark. He's dead now anyway. Good riddance.

"_Come on Nora, you know he's a fucking freak. You have seen what he writes in that cursed book of his. He needs to see a specialist. If not spend his next few years in a psych ward." I hear my dad scream from my parents room._

"_Bartholomew! How dare you even dare speak that way about our son. He is making his way through school and doing all this extra work so he can appease you and this is how you repay him? No wonder he writes what he does in his notebook. Besides, it's not any of our busine-"_

"_It is completely our business what he writes in that THING" He roars at her, slamming his hands against the wall. "What that boy does in my house is completely our business and no one can tell me otherwise Nora!" I run from my room when I hear my mother scream. _

_My mom looks at me and then slaps Dad in the face. "You woke him up! You see what you did! Do you really want our kid to think this of his parents? Come on Bartholomew, don't do this. Don't force us to make this choice now. We are happy." She's crying by the end of what she's saying._

"_Dad let her go! LET HER GO" I run over to him and push between the two. "Come on Daddy! What did Mommy do? Why did Mommy hit you?" Tears are coursing down my cheeks and my hands sting from the force of moving my dad. Next thing I know, I am being tossed across the room with a really sharp pain in my shoulder. Glass shatters as I try to recollect myself from the fall and I hear my mom scream. _

"_See what you made me do, you fucking FREAK?! You made me kill the only person I loved! The one person who kept me fucking sane! HOW DARE YOU CALL YOURSELF MY SON." My father roars__,__ storming towards me. _

"_Dad, leave me alone! Dad what are you doing? Daddy NO! " I scream as I run for the door then get yanked back by my waist and thrown on the bed in the room. _

"_You will learn to respect me from now on freak! You will learn what to expect from me from now on! You will never see daylight again, not ever!" He wails on me then, bruises form then blood splatters after a few hits. The only sound is his constant yelling, my screams of agony as he beats my body close to unrecognizable. I pass out after an inconceivable amount of time, still in pain all over. _

I jerk back to the real world and sprint for the nearest bathroom. I need the feeling of steel on skin. I need to get the feeling of my father's fists out of my head, out of the rest of my bodies' painful memories. I need to see blood flow.


End file.
